Me, Bae & the GAA


Spend most my Sundays following maps
Up and down the country just to watch your match
Win, lose or draw you’ll explain that black card
Sure it wasn’t your fault, the ref was being hard
Say “he started it first” and you had to “sort em”
And so it begins, the big match postmortem.

Monday night, you’re at the ice baths
I guess this means we’ll postpone the chats
About holidays, getaways and hotels with a pool
I’m mad to book something but I’ll play it cool
You can’t go in May or even in June
There’s a two week window and that’s “the rule”.

Tuesday night training means a drive to the sticks
So I suppose this means no chill and Netflix!

Wednesdays are made for dinner and wine
But you’re off the drink cos’ it’s “champo time”
A carb free meal it will have to be
Shakes are essential and protein is key.

Thursday brings a nutrition lesson
A hamstring injury and a physio session
Concern and worry over being fit and ready
The mood in the gaff is far from steady.

Friday morning, time to pack your kit
Rushing around no time to sit
I doubt you’re listening to a word I say
So it’s a good time to tell you I booked St. Tropez.

A Saturday phone call just to check in
You’re pumped and buzzing
All set for the win.

I’ll see you tomorrow, I’ll go watch you play
Hoping the injury keeps at bay
Cheering and roaring from inside the stand
Freezing my arse off with a coffee in hand.

Driving back up toward the big smoke
Now I’m the one ranting “that ref was a joke”
You laugh and nod because I “haven’t got a clue”

That’s GAA life, sure what can you do.



bridget jones shopping

Swapping nights at bars

For Tesco clubcards

Goodbye disco bopping

My weekend’s dedicated to shopping

Trawling the aisles and feeling that thrill

“3 for 10” she says at the till.

Wait as those points get added to your bill.


But when did I get old?


The joy that comes from a tidy house

And a happily fed spouse

Hair up in a bun

Swapping mornings in the sun

Just to get the washing done

“Great day for drying”

When did I become no fun?


Preparing lunches for the week

Getting a decent night’s sleep

Knowing grown up things like;

“Eggs are cheaper by the dozen”

Or the satisfaction of a spanking clean oven



At the end of the day when all is done

And there’s no clothes left to fold

And no one else to scold

Peer out the curtains at the noisy kids on the road

“Tut Tut…. so bold”

When did I get so old?



Never Ever Ever… Getting Back Together?

never ever

Would you have a shower and then put on the same underwear you were wearing beforehand? No…probably not. Well that’s basically the same thing as getting back with an ex.

You weren’t two star-crossed lovers separated by war or famine or some other tragedy that you’re likely to see in a Nicholas Sparks movie. Realistically, you broke up for a good reason. Maybe he cheated, maybe she was a controlling bitch or maybe you just got bored of each other and broke up under general circumstances. When it ended, you might have even agreed to stay friends. But can you really be friends with an ex? Continue reading

Do You Not Have a Girlfriend?

He's Just Not That Into You


You know them. The kind of bloke that needs reminding because he completely ‘forgets’ he has a girlfriend or rather is well aware that he does but chooses to ignore it on a night out or weekend away.

Everybody knows about her but for some odd reason they can’t bring themselves to mention her name or acknowledge her existence.

Just be grateful you’re not her. Imagine being that girl –  sitting at home picking a nice filter for your cute, little couple’s selfie, meanwhile your bloke is out partying like;

-“What Girlfriend?”


Continue reading

Breaking Up is Hard to Do…



There’s nothing worse than getting the boot(no point in sugar coating it) but what happens on the flip side?

Breaking up with someone isn’t an easy feat. It’s easy to take pity on the person being dumped, but really you should spare a thought for the other half. God knows they’ve probably been lying awake all night desperately googling the right/easiest way to get out of their relationship.

Generic Break Up Lines Often Used.

1. “Our lives are going in different directions” – They’re on the dole, you’re not. Enough said.

2. “The timing is wrong” – Ugh spare us. Sometimes though, the timing might not be good, especially if you’ve gotten together when neither of you were in a good place or when an ex is still on the scene trying to mess things up. It happens. Continue reading